Antonio, but the kiss was fantastic. (laughs)
HMMM
..ITS
BEEN SAID THAT ACTING WITH A WOMAN IS LEGAL CHEATING AND
Sometimes
it can get illegal. It depends on how infatuated you are.
YES.
SO. BEFORE YOU MARRIED MELANIE GRIFFITH NEARLY TEN YEARS AGO, WERE YOU LIKE
GUIDO CONTINI, FELLINIS PHILANDERING 8½ CHARACTER THAT
YOU PLAYED ON BROADWAY IN NINE?
Yes,
probably, in the way that you have been caught by many different candies
in your lifecandies called women. (laughs) But I
am past Guido now.
MIGHT
THERE BE A NINE FILM?
Yes.
Even a chance I might direct it. I love musicalsIm one
of those guys that gets chills just listening to the orchestra tuning.
NICE
TO HEAR A STRAIGHT GUY SAY HE LOVES MUSICALS.
Absolutely.
Or maybe its my unknown gay side. (laughs)
WELL,
YOU KNOW, EVER SINCE YOUR EARLY ALMODOVAR FILMS, LABYRINTH OF PASSION
AND LAW OF DESIRE, NOT TO MENTION, PHILADELPHIA AND INTERVIEW
WITH THE VAMPIRE, YOURE KINDA CONSIDERED AN HONORARY GAY.
I
just love that! Ive never heard that before, but I suppose I am, yes!
SO,
BEING AN OBJECT OF LUST TO BOTH SEXES, TELL US: WHO SENDS THE NUTTIEST FAN
MAIL?
Straight
women, 50, 55, they are the toughest. (laughs) Like, when I was doing Nine
a fan club came to the theatre and I thought I was going to find a group of
25 to 30 year old girls, but there were 150 women all in their 55 to 60s
and they were wild, babe! I got almost raped!
WHICH
BRINGS TO MIND YOUR FAMOUS DE-VIRGINIZING SCENE IN LAW OF DESIRE
..
Oh,
that was wild, too! I had open legs and am just going with my hand to some
cream by the bed in order to, um
.get it easy. (laughs)
UH
HUH. SO, HEY, IS YOUR RETEAMING WITH ALMODOVAR IN TARANTULA STILL HAPPENING?
It
could, it could. The last communication I had was through [slated Tarantula
co-star] Penelope Cruz who said, Youre gonna receive some calls
from Pedro soon. I know that at some point we are gonna find each other
again, thats for sure.
IN
THE MEANTIME, YOURE DIRECTING YOUR SECOND FILM, PLANNING A RETURN TO
BROADWAY AND YOUR SHREK 2 PUSS IN BOOTS WILL NOT ONLY BE BACK IN THIS
SUMMERS SEQUEL, HES GOT HIS OWN VIDEO SPIN-OFF SCHEDULED.
That
cat. That little fucker. People love him now more than me. (laughs) Women
have even said to me, (cooing) Ooo, I want to take that cat to my bed.
I say, (sneering) To hell with you!
BUT
IT MAKES SENSE FOR YOU TO BE INTERNATIONALLY KNOWN AS A KITTY SINCE YOURE
THE SON-IN-LAW OF THE REAL, LIVE CAT WOMAN, TIPPI HEDREN.
Its
fantastic. I mean, every mother-in-law has, like, a little dog, but shes
got seventy-two lions! Is that surrealism or what?
YEP---WIFE,
KIDS, FAB MOTHER-IN-LAW, YOUVE GOT IT ALL. WITH OVER 50 FILMS TO YOUR
CREDIT, WHATS REALLY LEFT TO ACCOMPLISH?
All
these years of working in Hollywood bought my financial freedom. Now Ive
started to do those things that I love without thinking, What is it
gonna give me career-wise? Because, really: Unless I want to have a
plane and a castle, I am absolutely fine.
©
2015 Brantley Bardin. All Rights Reserved.
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